Hanako Games

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Beta Testing / Discount Copies


hanako

Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#1 by hanako - Apr 4 2017

At last, England Exchange is complete and ready for testing!

A quick overview if you haven't been following development - you play an American college student doing a semester's study-abroad in London. You stay at a hostel with a bunch of other students, get a part-time job, take classes, and date! You can play either a male or a female protagonist, and each protagonist gets six romance options (four opposite-sex, two same-sex). There's a preview of the different character art in England Exchange! - I don't have a full game webpage up yet, though that may change shortly.


This is a Hanabira title, which means that I did not write the original script. However, I do have the rights to edit it! That means it is okay to make requests and suggestions. Really want more information about British TV licenses to somehow work their way into the story? Think that a particular character needs more screentime?
Ask for it! Not every request may be granted but right now is the last, best time to make your opinions count. Storylines in some games have had heavy rewrites during beta!

Romance paths in this game generally have multiple endings, though not every character has the same number of possible outcomes. These endings are NOT currently labeled with any sort of 'best end' 'neutral end' kind of thing - you just get to the end and that's the end you got. When you play, please let me know if this bothers you at all. Do you feel uncertain whether you got the best outcome? Are you confused about why you got the result you did? (If so, please describe what happened during your game and how it all turned out, and what parts you were confused by and so on.)

Obviously, report any bugs you encounter as well. Including if purchasing the game fails to give you a download file or something! Smile I am capable of screwing things up and I won't know unless you tell me....

Franka

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#2 by Franka - Apr 6 2017

Quick feedback, did one playthrough, yuri romanced Peggy. Happy with the outcome, though I did miss an ending CG of some kind.

It felt like there were a good amount of events, but at the start of the game it also felt like there were too many very short events. I appreciate setting the tone, but sometimes it was like reading the abbreviated version of the game.

I like that the characters don't seem like one note people, but at the same time, I did not find myself wanting to date anyone other than Peggy, Ashley and possibly Danny. Everyone seems so high maintenance and generally offputting. I particularly had issues with Ji Hyo, whose interactions left me pretty much bewildered. She kind of felt like a character who had wandered in there from a different game with a different tone, and it didn't feel like there was any basis at all for starting a romance with her by the time the choice came up.

It seemed like there was a farewell scene with Peggy missing when I left. It felt odd that she was never brought up when leaving, after I had been romancing her; until the epilogue of course.

Found a grand total of one typo, missing an "I" somewhere in this sentence:



Now, Persona 5 just downloaded, so apologies for abandoning you in favor of that, but I'll be back eventually..?

FantasyFan

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#3 by FantasyFan - Apr 6 2017

Yesterday I played through the Mark path (playing female) and I LOVED it. Mark is so adorable. I was wondering, does he have autism or something like it? Cause that's what it felt like to me (having trouble being too blunt, not picking up nonverbal cues, etc.). I know his backstory kind of explained his difficulties with social situations, but I couldn't help but thinking that autism could also have a role in it.

PS: I would very much like to have an ending gallery so I could keep track of how many endings I still need to get.
My game reviewing blog.

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#4 by hanako - Apr 6 2017

In this case your guess really is as good as mine. Smile I don't know what the original brief was for any of the characters, I had to read their scenes as written and try to figure them out in order to add more dialog in keeping with what was already there. But yes, being somewhere on the autism spectrum is a possibility.
PS: I would very much like to have an ending gallery so I could keep track of how many endings I still need to get.
There is a gallery for the CGs and a checklist for what character routes you've done. What sort of ending gallery are you thinking of? Something like in TRT where it showed good/bad/neutral hearts for each character? The original problem I had with this idea is that it could be a huge spoiler to find out ahead of time that certain characters have very different ending numbers than others... However, I can possibly work with that by hiding the number of endings per character until you get at least one ending for that character, and by that point you've seen their route so you have more idea of what you're getting into. Would that work, do you think?

FantasyFan

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#5 by FantasyFan - Apr 6 2017

Something like that could work. What can I say - I'm a VN completionist who likes to go for all the endings. Smile
My game reviewing blog.

MillaMaxwell

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#6 by MillaMaxwell - Apr 8 2017

I just played through one route as Malia pursuing Peggy and one route as Flynn pursuing Ashley and Mark. I noticed a few small errors along the way.

The word "the" appears twice in a row in this sentence:


I was able to do both Ashley and Mark's routes at once, which I'm not sure was supposed to be the case. It does come across as a bit awkward that Flynn is wondering whether his opera outing with Mark is supposed to be a romantic date, while at the same time clearly expecting Ashley to only be dating him... Either way, this line from Mark's route seemed pretty odd, considering that Flynn had already been on "proper" dates with Ashley by this point:


And this is a really tiny thing, but as a New England native, I have to point out that New York isn't actually part of New England so this line is kinda funny:

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#7 by hanako - Apr 8 2017

Huh, it isn't? Okay, that one was my bad. I'm Southern, I assume all you Yankees are the same. Smile Will switch it to Northeast then. Thanks!

(And no, you're not supposed to be able to do both routes at once, a variable must have slipped somewhere. Whoops!)

Naiomi666

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#8 by Naiomi666 - Apr 8 2017

I just played Angelo and Danny's route. It's funny how Angelo is the traditional guy, but Danny seemed to be way more old fashion in how he feels about his girlfriends. Angelo's route was very good and showed a lot of sensitivity on the opinions of both the main character and Angelo.

Danny is hot as hell and he scares he. I almost feel like the best ending for that route is to ride that train and the get off before your in too deep. Maybe it would be a good idea of Danny mentioning about going back to anger management for the protagonist.

I don't know if we can post spoilers or how to hide them so ill be a little vague. On Danny's route when I got that offer it felt anti-climatic afterwards. I would expect the roommates to be told the exciting news, or at least the best friends in America. It didn't feel right when the MC's best friends ask about your romance when you come back,and you say "we'll see how it goes." It just doesn't fit the route.

nightshadengale

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#9 by nightshadengale - Apr 8 2017

The beginning of this game was...a little too real for me. XD It's probably that I myself have social anxiety, but all lot of stuff at the beginning--like Malia standing awkwardly unable to ask to join everyone for dinner, conversations ending awkwardly because she didn't know what to say, Angelo and Brendon making me kind of uncomfortable* and me feeling like I had to be nice--it all hit a little too close to home! I don't really think it's a bad thing, it was just a much more emotionally intense experience than I was expecting.

*In different ways, but both ones I've experienced in real life--Angelo made me "guy with very traditional views on gender roles approves of you and it's nice to have people like you so you respond in a way he'll approve of even though you don't agree with his views" (?) uncomfortable, and Brendon made me uncomfortable in a "This guy seems like a jerk and is hitting on you in a way that makes you uncomfortable but you feel like you have act nice" way.

So far I've romanced Danny and Peggy (both as Malia)--they were the two I was most interested in from the character previews, and ended up being the two I was most interested in in-game as well.

Danny: Whoah. His route was...intense. Not at all what I was expecting, but in a very memorable way. It didn't seem very healthy, but I play VNs for nothing if not to vicariously engage in extremely unhealthy relationships. He's like...trying so hard not to be yandere, it's oddly endearing. This was the first route I did, and that playthough ticked off every checkbox in the left column except "Worst Ending" and "Gallery Complete."

A few suggestions on his route:
-The route didn't mention if he has any sort of required therapy or person he has to check in with occasionally, and I was curious about that. Did they really just let him free with no monitoring?

-I chose to exercise over break, but the first thing that happened after break was the date scene with Danny where Malia complains she should never have stopped exercising. It'd be a nice touch if that line were slightly different if you chose to exercise over break.

-When everyone accuses you of theft and he's on your side but won't stay with you and comfort you, it seemed odd. It wasn't entirely clear why he'd be too focused on sex to be in the same room with you right then. Is it supposed to be that he's feeling jealous after you ran into Brendon in the hallway?
I'm not sure whether this relationship is supposed to come off as in any way healthy, but it'd feel more functional if he did manage to stay with you and comfort you (even if he does so in a kind of creepy, intense way).

-After Brendon practically threatens you when you turn him down, I was expecting him to react if you end up with someone else, particularly one of the other guys (seems like it wouldn't hurt his ego as much for you to end up with one of the girls). I can see how an immediate confrontation with him after you start dating someone might be hard to fit at least in Danny's route in a way that didn't throw off the pacing (as I can't imagine Danny would react well), but after you get accused of stealing, the comment about Peggy being single hits a much stronger "creeper" note than the scene where you bump into him in the hallway with Danny.

-When you get back to the US at the end, I was really expecting Nene to notice your engagement ring and flip


Peggy:
I loved her so much holy crap.
I do think I liked her better off her route than on it, though. In the ending I got, it didn't seem like we got married, but we were travelling together.

Maybe it just happens to be the two routes I picked, but it feels like the girl romances are getting the short end of the stick a bit.
-All 4 of the guys can directly ask you out before you pick a route, but the girls don't (and at least Peggy had apparently never thought of you in that way)
-Danny believed me about not stealing, Peggy didn't
-The ending I got with Danny involved engagement and marriage, Peggy's didn't


As for the others:

-Aasi -- I found her pretty interesting, and ended up liking her quite a bit by the end of playing as Malia (I think I got the best outcome with her, she confessed to everyone that it was her who stole the money?) I can see why romancing her as Malia wouldn't really work (except perhaps as some sort of New Game +), but I reaaally want to.

-Angelo -- Cute, if problematic. Definitely interested in doing his route, though I hope you get the opportunity to change his views on gender roles a bit and don't just need to play along to do his route.

-Ashley -- She's nice, but I don't find her all that interesting.

-Brendon -- After the way he reacts when you turn him down, I would feel so dirty actually romancing him. When I reloaded a fairly early save to go for Peggy's route, I tried being more standoffish the second time you meet him in the bar to see if I could avoid him asking me out, but he did anyway. *shudders* I'll probably do his route anyway for completions sake, but...ugh. (Also, the spelling of his name seems odd--normally I see Brandon or Brendan, not Brendon.)

-Ji Hyo -- I think her sprite is adorable and was really excited about romancing her from the previews, but she was just a bit too weird and I didn't really feel any interest in romancing her. Maybe if there were a few more scenes with her studying you intently and a bit less of the odd glasses thing, I'd have been more intrigued? (Still plan to do her route anyway to see if the weird glasses thing is ever explained...)

-Mark -- Wasn't a fan of his sprite, and his personality didn't win me over. He's interesting, but I'd feel weird romancing him.

I'm also interested in re-romancing Danny and Peggy as Flynn to see what's different.

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#10 by hanako - Apr 8 2017

nightshadengale:


Peggy:
I loved her so much holy crap.
I do think I liked her better off her route than on it, though. In the ending I got, it didn't seem like we got married, but we were travelling together.

Maybe it just happens to be the two routes I picked, but it feels like the girl romances are getting the short end of the stick a bit.
-All 4 of the guys can directly ask you out before you pick a route, but the girls don't (and at least Peggy had apparently never thought of you in that way)
-Danny believed me about not stealing, Peggy didn't
-The ending I got with Danny involved engagement and marriage, Peggy's didn't
(Spoilers for multiple routes)

Danny's best ending is the only ending where you are actually married at the end, so the contrast would be most obvious there. The other routes with engagements are Angelo, Mark, and Ashley.
Most characters won't believe you about the theft at first. Danny is unusual because of his background.


As for the others:
-Aasi -- I found her pretty interesting, and ended up liking her quite a bit by the end of playing as Malia (I think I got the best outcome with her, she confessed to everyone that it was her who stole the money?) I can see why romancing her as Malia wouldn't really work (except perhaps as some sort of New Game +), but I reaaally want to.
The best you can get with Aasi as the femalePC is if you get the scene where she comes to your room drunk in the middle of the night and explains her backstory, and if you ticked all the checkboxes you hopefully got that. If this game is actually successful, I would love to add some sort of secret Aasi route as an update, she's my top choice to expand. The second one would be Ashley, who is canonically bi but her route is currently too connected to the male PC's job, so she'd need a lot of changes for a female option.

nightshadengale

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#11 by nightshadengale - Apr 9 2017

hanako:

The best you can get with Aasi as the femalePC is if you get the scene where she comes to your room drunk in the middle of the night and explains her backstory, and if you ticked all the checkboxes you hopefully got that. If this game is actually successful, I would love to add some sort of secret Aasi route as an update, she's my top choice to expand. The second one would be Ashley, who is canonically bi but her route is currently too connected to the male PC's job, so she'd need a lot of changes for a female option.
Yep, I did get that!

Just tried Aasi's route as Flynn--I think I got her bad ending, though I'm not sure what I could have switched to get a different outcome, so I'm not sure she has a good one? I tried reloading and switching the choice in the restaurant, but regardless, Flynn goes back to NY angry and distrusting everyone.

I really wish there were a way to help her heal a little!

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#12 by hanako - Apr 9 2017

NEW VERSION UPLOADED - 0.91

You should probably be able to use the download links you already have to get the new installers. If not, contact me with your order details and I can refresh your download links.

Things changed:

There's now a route endings list available from the checklist. You'll have to go through endings again to add them, though, previously played ones won't count. The number of endings per character will not display until you get at least one, and for some characters it is possible to get their 'bad end' scene while pursuing someone else and getting their 'good end'
A new scene and a couple of slight alterations to Ji Hyo early on
Some tweaks to the later bits of Danny's good end and the hiking scene if you exercised
Fixed the missing I, the double 'the', one missing facial expression in a Flynn/Aasi scene, New England -> The Northeast
Blocked Ashley's route if you agreed to go out with Mark

nightshadengale

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#13 by nightshadengale - Apr 9 2017

The updates to Ji Hyo definitely do make her a lot more intriguing! (At least to me.) Just finished her route, and it was adorable.

I have noticed that some of the routes feel like they're missing a goodbye scene at the end. It's less noticeable on the ones that have a scene towards the end that brings up the subject of you leaving, but it does seem like the person you romanced should see you off on the last day with everyone else.

I also tried Angelo's route earlier--it was cute, though it felt like the physical aspect escalated a bit too quickly. I was really surprised when Malia started trying to unbutton his shirt immediately after the confession scene, given how awkward-virgin she is on a lot of the other routes. XD I was also expecting his route would shed more light on the scene where you bump into him in the hallway and knitting supplies drop out of his shirt. I had assumed that meant he had some hobbies he was embarrassed about because he considered them too feminine, but it never came up on his route.

A couple typos I've noticed:
Danny's route: "Danny sat down next to me and gently took my feet in his." -> presumably his hands?
After you walk in on Danny and Peggy: "Then again, I had never seen him like that,, either."

nightshadengale

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#14 by nightshadengale - Apr 9 2017

I think there may be a bug with Brendan's rivalry--when I did Aasi's route on the old build, he came to my room drunk like Aasi does when playing as Malia, but both times I've tried Flynn since then (Ashley and Danny), he didn't come to my room, even though I picked the same "Try to understand" option in the kitchen. I get a scene where he gloats in the kitchen about getting away with it, and then it immediately transitions to the scene where he confesses. After he confesses, I don't have an option to forgive him, I automatically say that James will deal with it. (Loading up a save as Malia, the same thing happens if I help her to her room instead of hearing her out. Is it a bug that they confess right after gloating about getting away with it? James lurking with a tape recorder would be a satisfying resolution to the "they gloat about getting away with it" outcome, but I'm not sure why they'd confess unless they had some guilt about doing it, which only seems to be the case when they come to your room drunk.)

Played through Ashley's route as Flynn, and had some trouble getting her good ending--I'd figured from the way she reacts to the mugging scene that saying that everyone was definitely good at the very beginning was the right approach, but I had to go back and switch that choice to get her good ending instead of her neutral one.

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#15 by hanako - Apr 9 2017

Brendon is less lovable than Aasi is and getting his insight scene is trickier. Just picking 'try to understand' isn't enough. IIRC you also have to hang out with him and Aasi at the beach. (Aasi has either the beach scene or the one yardwork scene to get an extra point from) With both of them, you don't get the option for forgiveness unless you've made friends-of-a-sort. Not a bug, the random confessions are in the original script, I guess largely to tie up loose ends so the player doesn't feel angry that their name was never cleared.

Ashley's choices are a little weird but it was written that way in the original script, with no notes as to why. I don't totally understand the intent, but in a way it's more interesting than just picking blind faith all the time. I can invent ways in which it sort of makes sense, with a bit of head-scratching, and she does seem upset if you choose that everyone is definitely good. Perhaps she wants reassurance that some people (like Brendon) really do make not-nice choices, while at the same time not wanting you to jump to conclusions about people who haven't been proven bad yet? I don't really want to cut the original writer's legs out from under them there.

nightshadengale

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#16 by nightshadengale - Apr 10 2017

hanako:

Brendon is less lovable than Aasi is and getting his insight scene is trickier. Just picking 'try to understand' isn't enough. IIRC you also have to hang out with him and Aasi at the beach. (Aasi has either the beach scene or the one yardwork scene to get an extra point from) With both of them, you don't get the option for forgiveness unless you've made friends-of-a-sort. Not a bug, the random confessions are in the original script, I guess largely to tie up loose ends so the player doesn't feel angry that their name was never cleared.
Huh, I was pretty sure I'd managed to get Aasi's drunk scene without helping her in the yard or seeing her on the beach. I've generally been helping Ji Hyo and hanging out with whoever I'm romancing on the beach.

Having them confess no matter what does make the confession feel a lot less meaningful on the "make sort-of friends with your rival" outcome. If the main reason is to tie up loose ends by clearing your name, maybe someone could overhear them gloating (particularly if James is apparently lurking around with a tape recorder anyway)?

MillaMaxwell

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#17 by MillaMaxwell - Apr 10 2017

Alright, I finally finished playing through everyone's routes so I can offer more complete feedback. My first impression of England Exchange was that I didn't really like it as much as all the other Hanako/Hanabira games I've played because an abnormally high number of characters came across as awful people to me right from the start. Aasi, Brendon, and James (not romanceable obviously but still a major enough NPC to affect the tone of the game) all seem terrible from the beginning no matter what route you're on. Angelo also seemed pretty awful to me, although I should note that I have very feminist values and so he might not come across so badly for other people. And a lot of the other characters seemed weird or like they didn't really care about Malia/Flynn so I wasn't particularly drawn to most of them. Once I actually played through it, I did like quite a few characters and could appreciate when some characters weren't written to be likable, but I'm not sure I would have kept playing to that point if I wasn't already a big fan of your games.

I think the game really needs more CGs, especially on the good endings. Several endings (Peggy, Ashley, Angelo, etc) just have a blue sky as the background while the characters talk, which just seems really lacking. Most of the characters have an epilogue that would be easy to determine a good CG from. And for the ones who don't really, maybe a CG of Aasi/Brendon breaking up with Flynn/Malia or Flynn/Malia being upset at their friends at the airport? Even if CGs were only used for the endings that currently just have the sky background, I think it would be a big improvement and make the epilogues feel more rewarding.

I also really like nightshadengale's suggestion that Aasi and Brendon only confess if you talked to them when they were drunk and otherwise they just get caught gloating. As is, the change of heart kinda comes out of nowhere.

Oh, and I love the endings screen that was added in the update. It does a perfect job of hiding spoilers while also preventing me from spending ages trying to find more endings than are actually there.

Anyway, here are my thoughts on each character/route, in no particular order:

Peggy: I did her route first and thought I would like it a lot better than I did. I actually didn't find her nearly as annoying as all the characters did, but I thought her gossiping about your dates was just incredibly mean of her and had trouble getting past that, even though I got her good ending. It also really confused me that she comes to the airport to say bye to you in the neutral ending, but just appears to ignore you until the epilogue in the good ending. The lack of pre-epilogue goodbye scenes bugged me in a lot of characters' routes, but it was especially weird here just because the scene was already there in the neutral ending.

Ashley: In terms of her character, I liked her a lot. She was just very nice to both Flynn and Malia and seemed like a fun person to hang out with. Her actual route was kinda frustrating though because I kept getting her bad ending even though it felt like the choices I was making weren't really wrong. When I finally did figure out the correct combination of answers for good and neutral, it just felt really arbitrary. I know you mentioned above that this came from the original author, but I think it would make for a better gameplay experience if you edited the dialogue a bit to make it clear why certain answers are "wrong." I loved the good ending though. The proposal scene was really cute and I liked that Ashley actually does go to the airport to say bye to Flynn. Their conversation there was really nice too because it really did feel like they had learned from each other.

Mark: I liked Mark's route. That weird multi-route glitch that I saw earlier hasn't happened again, even when I tried to recreate it with the same choices as before. Since that was my only real problem with his route, I'm quite pleased with it now. I like how his social awkwardness is written consistently throughout, but it becomes more endearing and understood as his route progresses. The accompanying backstory fit into that arc quite well. Also, his sprite looks pretty adorable when he's really happy. It's an eager puppy dog sort of adorable, but that fits his character and storyline perfectly.

Danny: I wasn't expecting him to be my favorite character, but he was easily the most interesting and unique. My first impression was that he seemed like a nice guy, although a little creepy intense after the game, but holy crap I wasn't expecting that backstory. I'm really curious about what his crime was, but I also appreciate why that was not specified. It allows the player to fill in whatever they consider to be really bad, but not unforgivably bad, instead of risking alienating anyone by picking something way out of their comfort zone. I liked how Danny's aggression is seen throughout his route, even in little sequences like when he offers to go after Aasi/Brendon, but that it is always mixed with a strong respect for boundaries. The number of times he reiterates that he does not want to control Malia/Flynn (and actually follows through on that promise) help avoid this feeling like an unhealthy relationship. It still feels a bit uneasy, but I think that's the exact tone that it should have. I like the fact that his kindness and reliability are shown throughout the route and aren't just tossed aside in favor of focusing on a dark secret. I like that given his background, he's totally understanding about the whole theft incident. I love that he doesn't have a bad ending, just a neutral ending where he accepts your boundaries and moves on with an optimistic tone. And the proposal, marriage, and honeymoon made for a great good ending. All in all, this was just a really enjoyable, interesting route to play.

Ji Hyo: While I didn't dislike her as much as other beta testers did, when it came time to do Ji Hyo's route, I did suddenly realize that I had no interest in her story beyond completionism. I was pleasantly surprised. Her good ending was quite nice and she was a lot more fun to hang out with than I expected. I really liked the twist about her fake personality and the reasons why she would do that. It fits together really well, but I wish there was some way to make her true personality more evident in the early scenes so that she doesn't come across as quite so weird and off-putting early on. Try as I might though, I can't think of a better way to present Ji Hyo than what you already have.
I did find one problem in her bad ending scene though. She gives Malia/Flynn the painting of them posing by the riverside, but when I got this ending, I had refused to go out with her that day so she never had a chance to paint that. Maybe that scene should be mandatory for starting on Ji Hyo's route?


Angelo: As mentioned, my first impression of Angelo was really negative. On subsequent playthroughs, I did notice that a few characters mention that his traditional views on gender roles is the result of a cultural difference in upbringing thing, so I tried to be more open-minded when I actually played his route. I was pleasantly surprised by how nice his route was. I really liked how both he and Malia have to compromise to be together. He accepts that she will never fit his idea of a traditional lady and she accepts that he is going to try to protect her. He doesn't see her as a weaker/inferior person and she doesn't see him as patriarchal oppression. I liked that Angelo was relatively quick to realize Malia's innocence considering their experiences with Aasi at the hotel. And I liked that there was a scene before Malia left that addressed why Angelo wasn't included in the big goodbye scene. Oh, and his worrying about introducing Malia to his family in the good ending was quite amusing, as was her response. For some reason, I can't seem to figure out how to get his bad ending though. I've picked every "wrong" answer that doesn't actually lock you out of dating Angelo, but I still just keep getting neutral.

Aasi: My first impression of Aasi was that I hated her guts. Of course, I was playing as Malia and hadn't realized the role of the rival in the story, so I just saw her as a really nasty person who did something stupid and decided to attack Malia repeatedly for it. She seemed a lot more mean to Malia than Brendon did to Flynn because framing her for stealing a guest's possessions and sending her to the Do Not Disturb room just seemed a lot more potentially damaging than Brendon making more work for Flynn, but they both made great villains either way. I was more sympathetic to her when I saw her drunk scene and put the pieces together about her backstory, of course. And she seems decently nice in the early scenes of Flynn's story, so I was interested to see how she would be redeemed by her romantic route. Wow, was that expectation off! I actually really liked that she only had a bad route. I could tell very early on that she was only using him for his meager wallet, but I still really liked how it all played out. I liked that she only had a bad ending (thank you again for adding in the ending screen so that I didn't spend hours trying to "save" her!) because it didn't seem like there was really time for the sort of relationship that would be needed to develop her character into someone capable of having a good relationship, especially considering how long it took Flynn to even realize the sort of person she was. I was surprised that ruining poor Flynn's faith in humanity, friendships, hope for the future, etc. didn't count as the worst ending though.

Brendon: I played Malia's story first and my initial impressions of Brendon ranged from "stereotypical jerk" to "embodiment of rape culture" when he kept hitting on her after she showed no interest, told her that women never actually mean no, and even threatened her when she turned him down. By the time I played as Flynn, I understood how the rival aspect of the game worked, so I didn't have quite as strong a reaction to him as I did to Aasi, but he was still really awful and didn't seem to have nearly as sympathetic a backstory to put together. Brendon's route was one of the last ones I played and now I can definitely see why he got the worst ending. Flynn just loses faith in humanity, but Malia loses faith in herself. Those scenes were done very well and I liked that none of the standard reveal the thief, say bye to everyone, etc. scenes were present. It really helped you see just how badly that relationship hurt her. I liked how you can put together exactly what happened between him and Ashley between what Brendon says to Malia early on, what Ashley says to Flynn in her route, and the conversation in Brendon's bad ending. He's the only character in the game who really comes across as completely, unredeemably bad and that works really well. Also, I have to note that his face in the sex CG just looks like pure evil. The art for this game really fits quite well.

And finally, here are the last bunch of typos I found:

This doesn't flow well as two incomplete sentences, so I think it was supposed to just be one sentence without a period or capital letter:


I'm just posting a link to the image because it contains spoilers for Danny's route, but the word "didn't" is misspelled in this sentence:
http://i.imgur.com/xkbLRbb.png

This sentence is missing a period:


I think this is missing the word "the":


This sentence sounds weird, so I think it should be "was," not "were":


This should be "here," not "her":


I'm not sure whether this is actually a typo or if it's supposed to be like this, but if it's not supposed to sound a bit off, I think this should be "kept," not "keep":

There were a few other wrong tenses in the sentences after that, so I thought it might be intentional, but I hadn't noticed that anywhere else, so I figured it was worth mentioning.

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#18 by hanako - Apr 10 2017

For Angelo's 'bad' end you have to get the idea that he's interested in you, but immediately turn him down, so his path doesn't start, and then avoid getting the shopping friendship scene with him later. If these conditions are met, there should be an awkward goodbye scene with him near the end, with an added little kick if you ended up dating Peggy or Ji Hyo in the meantime.

nightshadengale

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#19 by nightshadengale - Apr 11 2017

MillaMaxwell:

Danny: I wasn't expecting him to be my favorite character, but he was easily the most interesting and unique. My first impression was that he seemed like a nice guy, although a little creepy intense after the game, but holy crap I wasn't expecting that backstory. I'm really curious about what his crime was, but I also appreciate why that was not specified. It allows the player to fill in whatever they consider to be really bad, but not unforgivably bad, instead of risking alienating anyone by picking something way out of their comfort zone. I liked how Danny's aggression is seen throughout his route, even in little sequences like when he offers to go after Aasi/Brendon, but that it is always mixed with a strong respect for boundaries. The number of times he reiterates that he does not want to control Malia/Flynn (and actually follows through on that promise) help avoid this feeling like an unhealthy relationship. It still feels a bit uneasy, but I think that's the exact tone that it should have.
Agree on this--after playing through Danny's route a second time as Flynn, it felt a lot healthier to me than I gave it credit for initially (when the most creepy-intense moments were the ones standing out in my memory). I think his neutral ending does a great job of conveying this, as well.

In the new extra bit at the airport at the end for his good ending, Jin Soo's vaguely worried face + "You certainly did have a time, didn't you?" seems a bit odd as a reaction to your ring. (It seems a bit odd as a reaction to you grinning and saying "We'll see how things go" on other routes as well...should he be smiling there?)



I tried Mark's route, and although he didn't stand out to me as someone I was interested in romancing, I quite liked it. It felt like the PC and Mark were on much more even ground than a lot of the other relationships, in that neither of them took on a set "role" in the relationship very much? It was a refreshing contrast to the other male routes. I also really liked his good ending epilogue.

I finally played Brendon because that was the only route I was missing, and...*horrified shuddering*. I was expecting it to have a similar trauma-level to Aasi's route, but that was so much worse. It does make more sense now why he asks you out no matter what and why he doesn't have a confrontation scene if you start going out with someone else despite him telling you you'll regret turning him down, though I do still think it'd make sense for him to have a stronger creeper moment after the money incident on some routes when playing as Malia.

(MillaMaxwell, what route is the letter in the last typo screenshot from? I admittedly haven't done everyone's bad and neutral endings yet, but I don't remember seeing that.)

MillaMaxwell

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#20 by MillaMaxwell - Apr 11 2017

nightshadengale:

(MillaMaxwell, what route is the letter in the last typo screenshot from? I admittedly haven't done everyone's bad and neutral endings yet, but I don't remember seeing that.)
It's from Ji Hyo's neutral ending.

nightshadengale

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#21 by nightshadengale - Apr 11 2017

Checklist and gallery complete! I continue to miss having a romance-sees-you-off scene on the good ending paths. (MillaMaxwell mentioned Ashley seeing you off on her good ending, but I only got that on her neutral ending, not her good one?)

Small graphical bug: If you skip during the start of Peggy's ice-skating date where her sprite fades in as she crashes into you, her sprite stays semi-transparent for the whole scene.

I didn't realize this right away after the initial trauma of playing through Brendan's route, but it's never addressed what happened to the missing pan, volleyball, and oil paints (at least in the routes I've played; still missing a couple bad and neutral endings. He was my best guess though.) Is the implication supposed to be that Aasi/Brendan took them to prime everyone for the idea of a thief in the hostel?

(Also, I didn't notice until my third or fourth run that the picture on the wall in the hallway is the first CG from Fatal Hearts. Cute!)

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#22 by hanako - Apr 11 2017

Yes, Ashley at the airport is only in the neutral end, same as Peggy.

I think the lack of a goodbye on good ends may have been meant to build suspense for the epilogue to come, but I can try to work in something open-ended so you don't know what's going to happen between you in the future, but it doesn't feel so much like it's just missing.


Thefts: This is one that I don't really know the answer to but I think you're probably right.

FantasyFan

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#23 by FantasyFan - Apr 11 2017

Hey, I played though Danny's yaoi route and I would really, really like to know exactly what he did in the past. Just a suggestion.
My game reviewing blog.

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#24 by hanako - Apr 11 2017

That is really a question for fanfic, I'm afraid.

nightshadengale

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#25 by nightshadengale - Apr 12 2017

hanako:

I think the lack of a goodbye on good ends may have been meant to build suspense for the epilogue to come, but I can try to work in something open-ended so you don't know what's going to happen between you in the future, but it doesn't feel so much like it's just missing.
Yeah, I think this would add a lot. Except on Danny's route, presumably all that would be true at the time is that the two of you have decided to try the long-distance thing and see how it works out, so it doesn't seem like it would diminish the impact of the epilogue. (On Danny's route, it'd be interesting to bring up how you're planning to keep in touch and plan a wedding while living in different countries and in college. Given that the epilogue is only a year later, they must've gotten on it quickly, unless they had a pretty minimal/small wedding.)

MillaMaxwell

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#26 by MillaMaxwell - Apr 13 2017

nightshadengale:

MillaMaxwell mentioned Ashley seeing you off on her good ending, but I only got that on her neutral ending, not her good one?

hanako:

Yes, Ashley at the airport is only in the neutral end, same as Peggy.
Oops, sorry about that! I did her neutral and good endings back-to-back, so I think I just kinda merged them together in my mind.

I love the idea of an open-ended scene where your romantic partner sees you off at the airport. Even just a scene where they hug and say "don't forget to write!" or something like that would be a nice touch so that you don't​ feel like they completely ignored you on your last day.

nightshadengale

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#27 by nightshadengale - Apr 15 2017

-You mention sudden romantic problems to Nene and Jin Soo even on Danny's path

-Sometimes I don't get Ji Hyo's movie scene towards the end, despite helping her with the bushes, taking her for coffee, etc. I know I've gotten it before without romancing her or talking to her at the beach.

-If you talk to Brendon and Aasi at the beach, I swear on one occasion Flynn got an extra line about not liking the fact that the pairs we were observing seemed to go together so well (presumably because he was dating half of one of those pairs), but I don't always get that line. It comes off unnaturally when your internal monologue there doesn't account for the fact that you're dating one of the people whose love lives you're speculating on.


And I know there wouldn't really be a good way to fit this into the game, I was thinking yesterday that it's kind of a shame there's not a chance for more interactions between Brendon or Aasi and Danny. Based on their drunken confessions to the MC, it seems like this could be really interesting--I'd guess they both see Danny as the same sort of privileged "your life has been way easier than mine, you haven't seen the dark side of the world that I have" type that they see the MC as. Seems like knowing the story there would have the potential to throw off their worldviews a bit. (Also, just a lot of potential for drama/irony even without any backstories being bared.)

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#28 by hanako - Apr 16 2017

The little "friendship event" scenes that can happen late in the game with people you aren't dating are mostly dependent on what activity you chose at Spring Break, though they also require that the person in question doesn't hate you. So you could be very friendly with Ji Hyo but still not get the movie scene. (This is partly an artifact because those scenes are leftover from a very early version of the game which had stat-raising, and the scenes would be unlocked based on your top stat. Since that got dropped, the requirements for triggering them are more obscure.)

The line about "And I don't like it!" is coded to occur if you talk to Brendon and Aasi but you're dating someone else.

Uploading 0.92 now. Changes:
- removing accidental "do do" from Angelo's route and other typos
- some tweaks to Ashley's early scene about people being Good
- a new Ashley scene with tea and biscuits late in the route (based on a real conversation!)
- fade problem when skipping with Peggy on the ice should be fixed
- Brendon and Aasi don't publicly confess at the end if you haven't befriended them, it's now much more ambiguous
- more interaction/goodbyes with love interests near the end on good routes, though it may not be quite what you hoped for

As before let me know if you need help getting the new download.
I'm hoping the content is just about settled now, but that doesn't mean you can't keep suggesting stuff.

nightshadengale

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#29 by nightshadengale - Apr 17 2017

hanako:

The line about "And I don't like it!" is coded to occur if you talk to Brendon and Aasi but you're dating someone else.
Yeah, I figured that was how it was supposed to work, but it seems to be broken in some cases. Just loaded up Malia saves on both Ji Hyo's and Danny's paths and she doesn't get that line. I do get it as Malia on a save from Angelo's path, and as Flynn on Ashley's route.

Played through all the new goodbye scenes. They're really cute!

It's also much clearer now that saying everyone is inherently good is the wrong choice on Ashley's route.

(And I did suspect the game originally had stat raising--there are a couple parts of your conversation with Danny and internal monologue on the first day that are a little unnatural and feel like they were only there to be a veiled explanation of a stat-raising system. Speaking of that conversation--the "British people actually do that?" line there re: locking people in attics bothers me every time, because it just doesn't feel like a realistic blunder. It'd come off as more naturally awkward to me if the PC realized it was a joke but just didn't know how to respond, and there was a long moment of awkward silence or something.)

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#30 by hanako - Apr 17 2017

(Currently fixing some errors where you could get Peggy and Ashley's good and neutral outcomes at the same time.)

FantasyFan

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#31 by FantasyFan - Apr 17 2017

Played Angelo's route and Asai's route.

Honestly, I can't stand Angelo. Things seemed to move way to fast with him (the PC goes from not being able to stand him to dating him just because he ogles her in the bathroom?) and seriously, you're supposed to just ACCEPT his sexist views that women are weak and need protecting??? Honestly???

Asai's route really lacked interaction - after you agreed to start dating her a long time went by with no choices. Her route made me uncomfortable as well, though that's for personal reasons (my ex was manipulative like that too). Also, can you get a "good" ending with her? I tried different combinations of choices and they all led to the same bad ending.
My game reviewing blog.

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#32 by hanako - Apr 17 2017

It sounds like you may not have the updates with the ending lists and other fixes?

FantasyFan

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#33 by FantasyFan - Apr 17 2017

Augh, I didn't realize there was an update. Downloaded updated version and will have updated comments, sorry.
My game reviewing blog.

MillaMaxwell

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#34 by MillaMaxwell - Apr 17 2017

I love the new good-bye scenes! They are very simple, yet sweet, and definitely help make the transition to the epilogue feel a lot smoother. And the revised confession scenes also feel much more in-character, so I like that change a lot too. I'm also really happy with the change to the wording on Ashley's route. I don't think I would have nearly as hard a time avoiding her bad ending if I started playing after this update. Oh, and the new scene with her was really cute!

I think the only problem I can still find is that I can still pursue Ji Hyo and be given the painting of Malia/Flynn in her bad ending without actually agreeing to let her paint Malia/Flynn earlier. It's not a huge problem, but it does seem a little weird that that's possible.

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#35 by hanako - Apr 17 2017

oh right i meant to adjust that to be the sketch from the living room scene (which is mandatory)

FantasyFan

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#36 by FantasyFan - Apr 18 2017

Okay, replayed Angelo and Aasai with the update, and honestly my earlier criticisms still stand. If the only ending you can get on Aasai's route is bad, it feels almost like trolling the player when none of your decisions ultimately mean anything. I get that Aasai's a bitch, but even bitches can have the potential to be . . . less bitchy. It seems that there should be a good or at least neutral ending for her - at least something that doesn't leave the PC feeling totally hopeless.

And there didn't seem to be any additions to Angelo's "good" route, so my points about him still stand.
My game reviewing blog.

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#37 by hanako - Apr 18 2017

Oh, nothing was changed about Angelo other than the little bit at the end, but if you weren't sure about Aasi's number of endings then I figured you didn't have the latest version, which might affect some events and errors you might run into.

Angelo is not my type, nor a type that I would have chosen to write on my own, that's about all I can say on that one. But part of the idea of the Hanabira line is that other writers might present some things I would never do on my own, for diversity. Really, a lot of these characters are not what I would write, but I've tried to keep them true to their original ideas (while expanding and tweaking to clarify). As for how fast things move at the start - believe it or not I actually did slow it down a little Smile and it's important to the events that they are moving quickly, but I'll try to expand on femPC's viewpoint a little bit more to explain why she's being so aggressive.

For Aasi, her ending does vary slightly based on your choices, but she's pretty much trouble from the beginning. If you want to see a different side of her, there's some information in the befriend option as the female PC (which, IF this game became a surprise success, could be expanded into a bonus mini-route, but I don't really expect it to.)

Other than that one thing in Ji Hyo's route and the Peggy/Ashley bug, I think this game is about ready to come out of beta so I can get back to working on my original projects instead of other people's scripts. Smile

hanako

Re: Beta Testing / Discount Copies

#38 by hanako - Apr 18 2017

1.0 version is uploaded - I still have to build demos before I can change the price and switch it over, but it's coming Soon now.

Changes:
- additional lines at the beginning of Angelo's route
- different picture in Ji Hyo's bad end if you didn't pose for her that time
- fixing problems where you could get good+neutral at the same time with Peggy and Ashley's endings
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